What makes you happy? One of the best questions ever!
Isn’t that what all of us are ultimately looking for… happiness?
If you really think about it, even every little move we make can be associated with our body’s way of trying to find happiness. Think of when you’re lying or sitting in a position that becomes uncomfortable- you will switch to a different position so your body will feel happy again. So; in essence, everything we seek is a way to try and find happiness. From the food we eat to the alcohol we drink, all the way to seeking out love and accomplishing our goals. These are all ways to find happiness, we think, but they’re also amazingly good at being distractions.
We are natural hunters of happiness, but sometimes we’re gatherers of bullshit- meaning that most of us have no clue what will actually make us happy. Most of the possessions, money, and thrills that we chase are only ways to kill time. But when that stuff isn’t there and we have way too much time on our hands, we start thinking about all the things we don’t have instead of appreciating what we already have. This makes us severely uncomfortable, which means being unhappy again because we haven’t found real happiness-which we were seeking out so desperately! This may sound like a familiar cycle because we all are going through it in some way or another. Some people do it better than others, but we’re all searching for our own brand of happiness.
Our discomfort and the quest for happiness can lead to many different distractions; such as food, alcohol, drugs, gambling, shopping, binge-watching any kind of distraction, to social/news media overdoses, hoarding of personal items, sexual addictions, fighting for useless random causes, spreading judgement and hate about other people’s choices; over love for money, the list can go on forever and none of it makes anyone, really and truly happy. What is happiness really? Are we looking in the wrong places? I think most people know the answer to the second question, so let’s explore that one first.
If you’re looking for something external in order to find happiness and it’s not there, you’ll remain uncomfortable, or else you will look for something else that might just do the trick. Let’s presume that works… now what? It’s short-lived! And then, it’s usually onto the next thing, but what if, there is no next thing, and so; inevitably, this pattern continues. Life, as we know it, happens a lot and then we wonder why there is no “next thing” and then the same old feeling of unhappiness is back! When you’re unhappy and there is no next thing, the feelings of lack, depression, and anxiety have an easier opportunity to settle in, and then almost nothing makes you happy! Anymore! So yes, you’re most likely looking in the wrong places.
If you’re not sure what happiness is to you, then there is a very good chance that you haven’t asked yourself this simple, but complex, question in the right way. Even though you really do know what it is, way deep down inside.
From my own experience: When we’re looking for ways to be happy we tend to focus on the person, place, thing, activity, game, or event, instead of putting our awareness on the actual feeling of the moment, which leads us to believe that it will be the event that makes us happy. This then causes us to narrow our belief on what actually, truly, does make us happy.
The truth is that you are the one that manifested your own happiness, and that it just happened to take place while you were with the person you were with, at the place you were at, or while holding the item that you just purchased, and you have the ability to do the same thing in nearly every situation that you’re in. If we focus more on the feeling of being happy then it might lead to a clue of where it came from and how to manifest it more often.
What if we could manufacture our own happiness without all the distractions?
How do you think that would change your attitude towards life, generally? I’m talking about being able to go through your day knowing that you are the only person that could truly make you happy, so that no person’s opinion would ever have a devastating effect on how you feel about yourself. I think that might change anyone’s opinion of how they view the world.
The problem is that most people don’t know how to get to such a place so they don’t even try! We spend most of our day trying to maintain a certain level of sanity while holding back most of our emotions throughout the day, so being happy isn’t really on anybody’s plate. As a culture, we’ve gotten to a point that we don’t believe we deserve anything better than what we already have, so instead of living and creating, we, as people, spend our lives defending a lifestyle that we don’t even really like. It’s easier to live with what we know, than to risk change!…Maintain the status quo just so it doesn’t change. Change is difficult, however, not changing sounds farther from any real happiness that I’ve ever been a part of, and it’s certainly a far cry from a future I would want to create and live in!
So what’s the solution?
Stop, put the phone down, turn off the T.V., the radio, the internet, Alexa, etc., etc. Sit down, close your eyes and resign yourself to being a little uncomfortable for a few minutes. You may think that this sounds entirely crazy but… you deserve it, so that can only be a good thing. If you’re constantly uncomfortable because your body is always being ignored- it’s time to pay attention to what your body has to tell you.
This time of year is a perfect example of people not paying attention, because we have a large sum of the population becoming infected with small doses of influenza in the beginning of the season, still getting sick, and then going to work- out in public, spreading the virus to everyone else because our culture is so distorted that humans seem to value themselves the least. You’re sick. Stay home. Get better. Pay attention to what your body is telling you. Stop hurting other people and others by spreading your disease to people with compromised immune systems. Please?
Anxiety and depression are almost like the flu for your mind and usually require a certain type of rest and reflection. We operate under high stress so often, so by pushing away our emotions and ignoring our feelings or sickness that we spread our negativity almost like the flu, we eventually are trying to get people to join in our misery. The type of discomfort that would cause negativity to be contagious is stored in the subconscious, so you may not even be aware of it, and it certainly does not resolve itself without getting to know why it might be there.
Next time you feel the struggle to be comfortable, try sitting with the sensation for as long as you possibly can, knowing that there is no possible way it can hurt you, and calmly ask yourself why you perceive it to be so uncomfortable. Many times when I have done this, I realize that the sensation is not very uncomfortable at all, and that I just have to attempt to relax and not take everything so seriously. Please don’t try and scare yourself more. Feel the commotion inside of you to see what your body is trying to tell you, and then disassociate any emotion from the sensation, so you can let it run its course. Disassociating might take some practice in the beginning, because most people don’t know how to allow the blocked emotions when these sensations in the body to arise, but it will be very worth it in the end.
Here’s what you will soon notice…
While you’re learning to do in this space called meditation, you will begin to feel less tension in your body the longer you sit with the sensation. It’s similar to acting like nothing is there, but still being aware of it, which may sound like it doesn’t make sense but it’s the way to allow the emotion in. Don’t chase it down. Don’t fight off any emotion, sensation, or feeling or you will defeat the purpose, and if you end up opening the proverbial “Pandora’s box”! Be prepared to stay there for a while and let it all go. As I said, you deserve it!
Consciously or subconsciously, you are the one holding onto these emotions and they are limiting all of your beliefs and decisions about what you can accomplish. The ONLY WAY to release them is by getting to know them. Trust me- I have been there, countless times. I know from my own experience that it will unlock the tension and remove the limits that the sensation was causing.
You’ll also begin to manifest pure happiness all by yourself because the past limiting beliefs and emotions that were holding you back, are no longer front and center in your consciousness. When you are able to go through your day knowing that you don’t need approval from anyone to be happy, or things like drugs and alcohol to keep the discomfort at bay; your life will instantly improve!
Start solving problems with a good attitude and know that your happiness depends only on you. Instead of making horrible decisions that have negative effects on your life, which comes from a place underneath all that stress you carry. You are not alone in this transition!
You can #BeHigherBeings when you can begin to love yourself and the life you have created!
This is one of the most effective ways of paying attention to yourself!
If you would like to learn more, I am offering you; because you matter! – A simplistic 6 week course to coach you on how to accomplish this type of confidence and security in your life. This course will undoubtedly assist you to set up and tick off every single one of your goals AND then make sure you know it so well that you can teach it to others!
Make a decision to make 2019 the best year of your life.
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